Tag Archives: Peter Crouch

Crouchometre Update

21 Mar

A sad day in the long and glorious history of the Crouchometre, the chasing pack of gnashers, lashers and manic pixie dream Spaniards have drawn level.

Although with Redknapp playing Crouch solely in the Champions league and Carroll staggering back to fitness it can’t be much of a surprise. Too bad I wasn’t craven enough to include Pavlyuchenko and Defoe on the Crouch team – they’d be romping it.

crouch outscores all

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The World Famous Crouchometre! (part one)

16 Feb

As any Spurs fan knows Peter Crouch is the reason we’re not challenging for the premiership title, the reason there’s traffic congestion on match days and the reason we didn’t get that promotion at work – even though we were far and away the best candidate and have demonstrative levels of productivity way above that of Jeff and even Carl.

It’s completely outrageous, so we’ve introduced the Crouchometre to monitor Uriah Crouch’s contribution against Fernando Torres, Luis Suarez and Andy Carroll – all of whom we could’ve, would’ve, should’ve had!

peter crouch's goals